The Brooklyn Bridge: It's All About Support!

Recently I celebrated another decade birthday.  This was a BIG one!!!

All my family plus two “adopted” family members joined in for a 3 ½-day weekend. There were eleven of us. This event was actually some ten years in the making. The previous decade birthday came at a tough time in my life, when I was going through a divorce and had ambivalent feelings about lots of what was happening. I was definitely not quiet about how unhappy I was then. While my sons did want to plan a Los Angeles party for me, I know, now, that I was just too debilitated by the recent events to take part in a huge celebration.

However, the next year I got to go on a great womens’ retreat to Isla de Mujeres, Mexico, where I got lots of special attention and even a special dairy –free chocolate cake from the residence chef, who was so proud that she found the right recipe. It was absolutely memorable.

But I missed being with my family.

I come from the time when kids were supposed to be seen and not heard, but I’ve grown and finally arrived in the vital place where I’ve discovered what I need and how to ask for it. My kids are ultra-important to me; I like to be around them. While they live in different parts of the country, Austin, San Diego and Eugene, OR (I’m just lucky that they’re not scattered across the world!)  I’ve chosen recently to live in New York. They have all visited, and we have had great times together, but they’ve never all been here at the same time. For this birthday I wanted to play with them, share outings and stay together.

At first I suggested, perhaps, a cruise, which met with a resounding “No!” After much deliberation, phone calls and e-mails back and forth, they all said they wanted to come to the Big Apple to do the things they’d never had time to do or were too busy to do on previous trips. We sent out a survey to gather information about preferred activities and dining needs. I think there were 39 items on one of the first lists. Everyone was very creative with their suggestions. But we whittled it down and came up with an agenda that intrigued everyone.

And so they came, my granddaughters presenting me with a magic wand and the proclamation that I could now have anything I wanted with a flick of my wrist! We all showed up at the chosen hotel at different times, assembling later for dinner. I carried my wand everywhere and got lots of juicy comments in elevators, at restaurants, and on the street. Of course, the family cameras were constantly clicking the entire time, and my wand was clearly visible throughout.  The pictures are wonderful; I get to live the week-end over and over just by looking at them, whenever I want. I’ve put the group picture of us posing at the end of our trip over the Brooklyn Bridge on Facebook, where it’s gotten more than 40 comments, some from people I haven’t connected with in many years. I like that.

We managed over the next three days to walk on the High Line, New York’s unique park situated atop old elevated train tracks, as well as visit delicious Eataly restaurant for dessert, visit my son’s New York office for a tour, shop at the wonderful UniQlo, the well designed Japanese store, visit the Museum Of Modern Art for the Cindy Sherman show, have a super tour at The Brooklyn Botanic Garden under the cherry blossoms, walk over the Brooklyn Bridge back to Manhattan, see Newsies, enjoyed by all for its fabulous dancing, great sets, and good music, ate well at places where all dietary requests could be met (no small feat!), host a big brunch for 46 friends and family and then hold a final review of everything! I saw lots of smiles, different groups hanging out together, and heard lots of laughter.

There was something for everyone and it has been declared an “awesome” time by all. All the conversations, phone calls and e-mails, but most importantly the attention we put into the planning of this weekend, were worth every moment. For me, it was a dream come true.

Not only did I have a sensational, nurturing and memorable time, I recognized a very important truth again, as I walked across the Brooklyn Bridge holding my wand and linking arms with many of my loved ones. My family was concerned that I might not be able to make it across due to the cold, the wind, the distance, etc., but I never doubted I could, and I did. I realized that when you feel the support you need from those you love, you can do anything.