March Brings My Birthday and Thoughts of Japan, as Time Flies.

My birthday's in March, so it's always a special month for me. I wait for it to arrive, always say that I'm going to celebrate all 31 days, and, suddenly, it's April 1st. I know that time is going faster, because I've read that it is so. I think that I can almost feel it's fleeing...I look at the clock one minute, do something quickly, and another hour's gone.

I did have a wonderful birthday week-end this year, though, filled with family and friends. I got to spend time with all three sons during the month, for which I am most grateful.

My 22nd birthday brings back a flood of memories. I was a new bride, and I had the great, good fortune to be able to live in Japan for nine full months. My husband had been sent to Sapporo by the Army. He'd been drafted right after he'd received his degree in economics. The Army made him a telephone repairman. Luckily for us, he got a strep throat, when he was about to be shipped overseas, was hospitalized and re-assigned to the payroll department of the Quartermaster Corp. Lots of economics there. Lucky break.

The Masaki family took us in, let us live in their upstairs, treated us like their own kids, and celebrated us and every holiday that came by. On my birthday in Japan, my mother sent the recipe for my favorite chocolate cake and a very special lady baked it as a surprise. I carry the memories of my time in Japan in my soul.

The cherry trees have already blossomed in Japan, giving that country magical qualities for the month. That phenonmeon is given great attention annually. I've was there at that time of year. It is like fairy land. The Japanese celebrate grandly with parties, picnics, poems, songs. They realize that that display of nature is really something and spectacularly memoralize them with song, drink, togetherness and cameras. It's wonderful. It's a great family time. I shall go again.

The school year's almost coming to a close. People are thinking about their summer vacations, already, and soon June will be here...Oh, Mother's Day does fall in-between. If I had enough resources, I would celebrate this Mother's day by taking my entire family to Kyoto, and the southern parts of Japan for as much time as we all could eke out...

I know my family's full of all ages now, which could make for interesting decisions about what to do and see. I wonder how long some could be away from their texting and social net-working.

It definitely takes some negotiating and listening to travel with family these days. It's best to know that there are lots of different needs and opinions in one's "tribe." Perhaps, it's worthwhile to operate very democratically and take votes on everything. And if the minority doesn't like what the majority wants, they have permission to secede and go where they want, as long as everyone shares at the end of the day. I could handle that. I know that I would win some and lose some. That would be ok, too. I would be savouring everything all over again and with some new eyes.

Tomorrow's another Monday. Best I get ready for it.

Attention, Attention: How Vital is It?

I saw the new version of Chorus Line tonight and absolutely loved it. It's all about attention - how much attention is paid to the 1000 who auditioned to get in the show. These young people have really spent years getting ready for these grueling auditions, at which some lose and some win. You see the agony and the ectasy. It's a very emotional movie, for it's so well done, that you feel the pain and the elation of the dancers. I cried several times, sometimes from hurt and other times from joy.

Most of these kids have known from childhood that they wanted to be dancers. Perhaps, their parents knew before them., recognized something in them and supported their being able to grow to professionalism. That took immense attention for everyone: the hours spent in taking lessons, driving to lessons, driving home from lessons, shopping for shoes and costumes, having massages when necessary - to name jut a few of the required activities. It actuallybecomes a full time job. One young woman talked about how much her mother loved to dance, but when her mother married her father, he forbade her to dance and put an end to her passion. So her mother's passed that passion on to her daughter. This is not common. Also heard," If it weren't for you, I would have been a famous dancer!"One dancer's father was one of this country's best professional dancers who started his own dance troupe. His name was Jacques La Boise.

When you're a dancer, you have to pay attention to your entire body which includes your feet, your legs, your upper torso - all of you really. It's an everyday thing of practice and more practice and healing the physical hurts and pain.

Actually a dancer's body is his art form; he has no other product. Their stamina, their physical prowess is amazing and memorable to watch. When they can't dance anymore, who are they?
That is one of the questions asked.

I would highly recommend this movie; it comes out in April.

We're already in the middle of March!!!

March, the name and the month, is special for me. It's my birthday month, and it also happens to be my last name. Wonder if there's a coincidence there?

I start celebrating the first day of March, which seems like it was yesterday, and already it's the twenty-second...I know people who won't celebrate their birthdays, don't want to, and I feel that I have to make up for them. I think that's a real pity, for that's the day we were born, arrived on this planet to make a difference ...when we can commit to being in integrity, being authentic and choose to heal ourselves and the planet. Celebrating is good!

Some people still have to learn to receive, to let others acknowledge them. Childhood memories creep in here, and if early birthdays were stressful, adults tend to shy away from wanting to do anything about their birthdays. When birthdays fall on or near Holidays, there are stories...memories which live forever...I have collected lots of stories about that phenomeon!!!

My, my soap box is really turned on tonight. I think I have some extra vetting energy because I took myself to my favorite deli tonight and was totally disappointed in everything I ordered - even commented to the waitress, who shared that other patrons felt the same way - no flavor whatsoever...I finally took a piece of their rye bread, always terrific, and dipped it in Russian dressing -that was fabulous. I could put Russian dressing, Thousand Island, on almost anything, and it tastes better. That must be from my mid-west Detroit roots.

I've been on a movie prowl lately and have seen three good ones: I Love You, Man, Everlasting Moments (Swedish) and Two Lovers. I guess I'm exhibiting spring fever behavior. The first movie is a wonderful stab at explaining male bonding/friendship which for so many has become so suspect...actually...I really liked that movie.

Spring: Time for flowers...lots...makes me feel honored and cared for; my balcony garden is looking good!

I've been motivated to write much more lately, to complete my long-awaited book and to get some product ready for Web site - I've got cheerleaders in residence who are really pushing me, as they think my work is vitally important, timely and needs to be out there - this really helps. I am grateful.

Just heard mega rain outside and as I love to sleep in the rain, after reading the Sunday New York Times, I think it's time to head off to bed. Another week has come and gone; I am always running out of time these days - lots on my plate - making me very happy and challenged. Good to feel creative.

Hope all's well all over the world tonight, especially with all my family and friends scattered here and there. I shall send them extra positive attention through the air waves...

Amazing Attention for Me and for a Portugese Dog

I am very curious this morning. I've visited my Web site and observed that certain visitors stay for many minutes and do not leave their e-mail addresses, so they can receive up-to-date messages from me - a newsletter - an offering - a meditation. Others stay for a nano-second; I sincerely wish I could talk with them, especially the ones who stay around. What more could I share? I just hope that this is not the way of the world - a one way communication system.

Interacting with others is a must for me, either in person or, at least, on the telephone. I want to hear their voice, see their eyes, feel their energy. I don't text. Oh, I can. I just have to turn on my thumbs. But that just isn't enough for me.

A friend and I saw "I Love You Man", a new movie, last night which dealt with many male friendship issues and did it thoughtfully and very well, I thought. My friend and I talked about how we both felt about all this texting, wondering if the next step in all this non-personal communication will be having a chip implanted in our heads: a frightening and dismal thought.

There is a very fine science-fiction book which already describes living that way. It's called "He, She, and It." Scary. Are we headed that way?

But why do I want to tell you about the Portugese dog? Because I saw one this morning, and I heard that the Obamas are considering this breed for their family. It's hypoallergetic, is very loving, is very cute, and also needs lots of attention. They repeated that word over and over again as that's the bottom line - like any family member. This one particularly needs to learn who's the leader! Other family members need other kinds of attention; everyone does not need the same kind. Family's really work well, when they determine exactly what the needs are for each member, as they're all different....a novel thought!

I personally need time to see, because I am so very visual; there are musical souls in the song world, the world of orchestra s, the composing worlds. And there are physical souls who are in the sports world, dance world, hiking world. We all know them.

I "tank up" in museums, shopping in special stores, walking in visually gorgeous places, reading wonderfull illustrated books, looking at the sunset, and beyond. When I go into a new home, I always first look out the window. I am a trained hand-weaver, love to make collages and have even painted in San Torini once, which was the most of the best....

We've got to discover what turns us on and share that information with the people we care about, so they can support us in getting the specific kind of attention we need!
I guess it's time to step down from my soap box!!!

The Full Moon is Here!

Yesterday a friend and I spent the entire day in Santa Barbara, attending a Women's Networking Festival. The ride along the ocean was grand, as it was a gorgeous day and there was little traffic. I feel so lucky to have the freedom to spend days like this.

The Universe was doing its work with me, as I met exactly the women I was supposed to - funny how that works. Great women. Long day. New info about drinking alkaline water to stay healthy and keep disease away. I plan to put lemon juice in my filtered water daily now, as that provides enough alkaline, though they now have miraculous water machines to do the trick. People are awed by their new energy, fitness and healing through their new alkaline habit.

We ended our trip by having a great dinner in Malibu to celebrate her upcoming birthday. Our birthdays are meant to be celebrated - all of them - I find it very sad when people don't want to celebrate theirs anymore, because I know "The Attention Factor" is involved here. I also know that lots of kids never had a real chance to celebrate themselves as they grew up and when their parents couldn't or wouldn't celebrate them, it's left lingering damaging patterns. Kids whose birthdays fall near Holidays have major stories to tell about their disappointments, when their special days morphed into the holidays: Valentine's Day, Christmas, Easter, etc. I've even heard Mothers and Daughters fight over the re-telling of celebrations. Lingering memories.

Birthdays are special and the more of us who continue to honor our friends are family are spreading positive and loving energy onto our Planet.

So. Let's honor the full moon, too, and the gyrations it seems to bring. That's why I am writing today, to ground myself, to hopefully give myself the attention and energy to work on some life details I need to today. I'd rather be walking at the beach...or going to a movie...or....and the change in DST time has thrown me into a minor jet lag, additionally! Perhaps, spring fever is setting in.

My mind keeps rejecting those details. However, I am finding more and more that when I make lists of the things I need to do and check them off one by one, I feel more empowered and creative. How easy that sounds and how easy it writes. Simply, I want more and more of those feelings!

Diamond Alignment

Last week I encountered Diamond Alignment, which is an on-line meditation which really gives you a bolt of fresh energy within 6 minutes - it also gives you an uninterrupted 6 minutes to yourself - really refreshing and unusual these days.

I am grateful ...joyful... and thrilled to have this new tool in my repertoire for a positive "time-out" --- the source for this doesn't even know I am writing this today - I wonder if she'll ever find out how really grateful I am to her for taking the time to create this....her name is Jacqueline Joy...She lives in Carmel and is one of the lovelies women I have met this past year .... and she arrived with a totally fabulous story.

Bucky Fuller used to speak about processional events--- you're going down one road and suddenly you make a 90 degree detour which turns out to be exactly where you were headed in the first place. He too was a most exciting person to be around...I think my life is encountering lots of these events lately... One never really knows, does one?

I am thinking of all the special folk I have met lately, sometimes because I followed my intuition, sometimes the Universe intervened...I look forward to meeting more and more special folk.
I know there are many out there...

An Intense Week Followed by Re-Entry at Home!

I had a fabulous opportunity last week to participate in a Speakers' Intensive given by Teri Hawkins at Mt. Bachelor, Oregon. There were eight of us, all ages, from all over. I got there before my two other housemates and unpacked while I was watching the Oscars. Arriving around 5pm from the airport, I was immediately awed by the crisp, clear air, which felt so good.

The week started at 9am on Monday. The first exercise had to do with forgiveness! Over and over Teri told us that it's vital to spend time daily before retiring forgiving ourselves. That is another way of paying attention and taking the time to give ourselves what we need to heal some of our guilts and jettison some of our baggage.

And that was only the very beginning. Every day was packed with more exercises, more self-revelations, more connections. It was like an adult summer camp of the best order for me. I loved it all. I loved being with a group who bonded together over meals and participating with each other. We told our stories and learned to tell more stories.We grew inside, we grew in relating to our fellow attendees, we grew to be better speakers. I was outed about my age and my quirkiness...they laughted at me and declared me to be one very funny lady - far funnier that I am conscious of...I am getting it, finally.

I am allowing myself time now for reflection, to reorganize my home and my thoughts, before I undertake a new speaking direction.

While the snow was piling up in New York, I was expressing my gratitude for living in warm, sunny California and for giving myself that wonderful week of learning, of being, of growing...now to create a viable, meaningful, financially rewarding journey.

Attention! Technology Trauma over Twitter of Private Phone Number!

There was havoc on my phone today. I paid for a conference call, which started out splendidly enough. Suddenly, there was a major echo on the line, which practically drowned out the speakers, and then came chaos. Somehow, the special number to get on the Conference Call got to Twitter and hundreds of people called in to get on the line; they interrupted the entire operation.
We could hear the tech people igeting involved, and they kept aplogizing while working to straighten out what was happening. The host of the call got on to apologize more, followed by more tech people. The final verdict was to drop the call, start all over another time, which meant more scheduling of visitors and speakers.

It appears as if we need a new set of manners in this new tech world. There's a kind of madness afoot. Not only are we bombarded with new technologies, social networks being one, but all kinds of new soft-ware to bring over-the-top commercials, major ways to make more money, systems to reach more people, create more sales. But now people are invading private calls. Where is all this leading?

Perhaps, this new world of technology and the Internet have become one huge game with a larger-than-life playing field, This is a world-wide game you can actually play from home, the coffee shop, the library, the airport, your bed, under a tree. Wow, my imagination is really taking off!

Best we pay more attention to all of this. I hear that all of us seem to be running out of time daily because of all the tech glitches, down-time, and learning curves!!!

We definitely have to create some new kind of boundaries, respect and manners for this new Industy we've spawned.

Who's going to go first?

Meanwhile, I think I am going out to walk in the sunshine and let the tech gurus solve the problems of my phone line this morning.

Hurrah... It's Been A Great Monday!!!

Heard tonight about a diet project supervised and created by Pfeizer---participants are on their medication, of course. However, in addition, they're providing phone consultations for support, which is super attention for the participants - who are losing more weight than ever...they're also exercising,keeping food logs and getting emails for further support: proving once more that personal attention really makes a difference.

The rain today in Los Angeles has left us shiny clean and full of negative ions, which we need here desperately to buffer all the traffic.

Have sent out my 5 1/2 minute reflection audio to a new email list and am excited about that. People are telling me that they're listening to it twice and sending it on to others to enjoy. This is very good news.

Had a wonderful conversation with my oldest son, David, about transformation.

Have also gotten the green light to send out an audio-interview I did with Christian Carter about the need for attention in relationships. It's a great dialogue and I am pleased to share it again and with more people.

I wish every day was Valentine's Day; there would be much more love in our world.

Another Friday's here -

This has been a week of miracles...
Finally got my first real e-mail blast sent out with a gift of 5 1/2 minutes of music and reflection-time; I like the response, so far. Complicated and took mega hours to do, and I've learned lots!

Valentine's Day is tomorrow; I've written two new articles and done considerable memory-catching - I got an e-mail from someone who believes that women, who don't have a man in their lives, freak out; I disagree, tho' probably some do. I believe that many women are doing their inside work to heal themselves and to discover who they are as women, individuals, and alone. Powerful stuff...Before one can really have a healthy relationship with another, one has to have one with themselves - I am convinced...

A modern male Mary Poppins has arrived in my life in a round-about way - he's organizing my tech stuff and giving me the support I need to get my work out and around...he's also an Aries!!! He's like another son to me - this whole event has been miraculous. He looks so much like my father...now, isn't that amazing?

I've had faith about this one - that the right person would show up; after three days of working together, I am beginning to think he has. I so need another mind around...not to mention, eyes, ears and fingers for the computer...

I could eat lots of chocolate today - I'm fightig the urge!!!
I am going to make tomorrow, Saturday, last a long time; I need a mini-vacation!

Thoughts for a Friday...

I have so much in my head to write about today, I hardly know where to begin.
I know I have to comment on Angela Suleman, the new mother of eight, who already has six other children at home, is single and lives with her parents.

I just wonder how she is going to parent all fourteen children and give them the individual attention they need. I am boggled by the reality of her situation: bottles, food, diapers, vitamins, runny noses, tears, etc. As a mother of three sons, I can look back now to see how parenting is a hit and a miss experience. I did the best I could at the time. I only wish I knew then what I know now – a common lament I’m sure for everyone. I would have handled lots of events differently, discovered their particular needs for attention, gotten more help and spent more time just hanging out. I can remember how my kitchen became a place to gather, after the dishes were done, of course, where one or another of the kids would wander is just to talk.

I am in the process of writing a book, “Positive Parenting” which is a bottom-line experience-advice book for new parents. I’d better get it out there, yesterday!

On my Soapbox for the day: I am crazed with how many commercials appear on my Web browser where I have to be a captive. I’ve seen the Pillsbury ad for croissants about four dozen times, until I don’t think I could ever buy any. Mr. Ameritrade comes by constantly in his helicopter, followed by all the neighbors who’ve switched from their old brokers to seven dollars a trade at Ameritrade. The first ten times, I was curious about all the new clients; now I wish I could just “TiVo” past them. I personally would rather pay some money up front to eliminate being interrupted constantly. I am working to eliminate them.

The sun just appeared over Los Angeles after a 1 ½ days of wonderful spring-like rain, so I think I have to go get some…..

Inauguration Day Tears

I have wept today, during the Inauguration and after. My tears, I think, were of relief, of knowing I was witnessing a special, integrated, brilliant man become our 44th President. He is so present, can let his vulnerability show and be spontaneously appropriate.

I have read his books, so I know he’s taken his time to figure out why he is who he is. That’s important to me. He can only be a better husband, father and President by coming to grips with his emotional and inherited baggage. We all have it and sometimes I think that our baggage is interacting with everyone else’s baggage. He’s paid enough attention to his that it doesn’t weigh him down; everyone knows about it. How healthy! What role-modeling for the rest of us.

When he acknowledges his feelings, as he did about Ted Kennedy’s departure for medical reasons at the Congressional Luncheon, he connects to us. That is so refreshing. Indeed, he’s bringing change to America on all levels. He’s showing a sensitivity to people that is thrilling. He reached back to honor the Black WWII airmen by inviting them to Washington; they were genuinely overwhelmed to be so remembered.

He is openly affectionate with his family, he shares his wonderful sense of humor with us, as he did during his service work to honor Martin Luther King Day, and tells us that he is taking all of us into the Oval Office with him. I feel both lucky and grateful to have been able to spend part of my day today in front of my TV set. I don't usually do that...

Female Mavens Unite

I hereby commit to creating a new community via my upcoming Web site:
Female MavensandMoguls.com

I've recently discovered that new title for myself - I feel, and that's important, that I have sufficient wisdom, experience and expertise to qualify; I know there are hundreds of others in the same position. We are over 50, probably parents and grandparents and have spent mega time volunteering for events, services, people, places that we hold dear and which are necessary to maintain our humanity. I must add that it's not necessary to be a parent.Some of us have had huge careers and been well paid, others of us have worked for free because we have been called to, others have done both.

Our world now needs us more than ever, to step up, to shout out, rationally, what we have learned...the lessons we've had to encounter and handle...there's much positive energy here which, I believe, needs to be harnessed and used to bring new adulthood and wisdom to the world --- to mentor, to use another word --- people and places that are in need of support, cheerleading and a smile.

Smiles connect people. They make the one being smiled at feel that someone sees them, connects with them, and sends them good vibes. Smiles don't have to cost anything, we never run out of them if we want, and they're a way of greeting another whose language we don't speak. A smile is an instant form of communication. Morever, when we give people the kind of attention they need, they instantly smile back. I wonder if you've ever noticed that?

I am going to see how many smiles I can give out today. I hope I give too many to count.

More to come.....

Miracles Are All Around Us, When We Pay Attention

First miracle of today was just watching an unbelievable video:
www.maniacworld.com/are-you-going-to-finish-strong.html.
I will just tell you it's about a young legless, armless man who made the audience (and me) laugh and cry and certainly begin to wonder how much more we can do in our lives!

Yesterday's miracle: a man found me on an Internet site, wrote me a letter achnowledging what I was doing; we met for lunch and sat talking for three full hours. I have never met another person who reflects back to me so clearly the results of my perspective on attention. He is thirty years younger than I am, is black, has a widely listened-to radio show and has won several Grammeys for his editing work. He's also written a book for and about his 6 year old daughter.
He told me a story: One night he was driving on a freeway and his Mercedes car just ran out of power; he managed to glide to an off-ramp and to cross a busy street to take the only remaining parking place. People were going and coming in front of a bar. No one stopped to ask if they could help.

Finally, a homeless man with shaggy blond hair appeared out of nowhere. He asked what the problem was and lifted the hood, said he'd go to look for a mega-sized paper clip and return. He did, wrapped the clip around something in the engine and insisted that they take a ride to see if the car was fixed. It was. They rode around four blocks and my new friend asked his "angel" how he knew exactly what to do...he said he'd been a Mercedes mechanic, had had a wife and child and had had lost everything, when his house burned down with his family in it; he was now homeless and living in a box. Unfortunately, they never met again; the paper clip stayed in place boosting the car's power for as long as he owned it.

Today is my second son's birthday. When he arrived, I thought he was a miracle, for I had been a rather unhappy only child and now my oldest son had a brother.

I am silenced by the awe I feel for the support I receive from The Universe!

My Holiday Agenda Was Full of Movies.

I have to admit I was an avid movie goer during this past holiday season. All of the movies gave me food for thought, showed lots of humanity and brought very fine actors to various depths of demanding roles and gave us some meat!

The needs people have for attention was explored in every single film.

I thought that Milk was terrific and handled an incendiary issue with great respect by showing how well people worked together to gain attention for equality, civil rights and recognition. I felt Gran Torino explored the issue of people of different cultures learning that everyone really has the same needs to feel safe, honored and respected. Doubt certainly provoked much thought and great conversation with others: do we ever feel so totally strong about something that even we can ultimately come to doubt ourselves? Frost and Nixon certainly had me squirming in my seat, as I watched both main actors go through their personal trials.

The French movie, The Class, brought a sense of the real challenge of teaching teen-agers from various ethnic backgrounds, and I ended up having quite a dramatic conversation with a colleague about the teacher's role. I thought the kids were impressive in both their honesty and spontanity.

Last Chance Harvey showed that a rather unconscious man can wake up, grow up and start dreaming again. And Marley and Me brought honest marriage issues to the film as well as the truly emotional role a pet can contribute and demand in a family. Even Jim Carrey's movie Yes, Man provided a theme to contemplate! All in all, it was a very good season. And there were examples of good and bad attention in every film!

I've heard that colds are really unexpressed tears!

I've had the worst cold for the past three days; I actually got it on New Year's Eve, but then I thought I was allergic to something...I've given myself lots of R&R, soup and reading...but all the while I've been thinking about why I needed to get a cold at all.
I've been really upset with the Madoff saga, for I know how much we need generous donors for our various non-profits at this time. That one man destroyed a whole system, practically; the outreach of his greed, "sociopathness" and limited social thinking boggles my mind, and I can't get over his inhumanity to man - that's what really bothers me, and I should have cried about it. They say that people trusted him, they liked to be in his company, they say that he had had a good track record.
Neither his sons nor his brother knew what he was doing. Why didn't the SEC act on some red flags that were presented to them by some financial people who recognized that the numbers didn't make sense. Whatever, whoever???
I still feel like weeping for the values this story tells. Simply, people were not paying enough attention!!!

In the end it's the thought that counts...

The 2008 holidays have come and gone; I am left wondering how many people got the kind of attention they really wanted...Did they get the kind of gifts they wanted? Did they get included in special events and with special people? Did they get to feel that their families really cared about them?
I got a truly thoughtful and special gift from my family this year. Two of my sons, one of my daughters-in-law and my youngest granddaughter sat around my dining table for several hours, while we all plotted out my 2009. What would I need to organize my year? What would it take for me to finish my book, to move part-time to New York? They even gave me homework to do, which I did and sent them for their review...Their gift to me was their time, their sensitivity, their awareness of the kind of support I needed. I was truly impressed, inspired and grateful. And that's a gift which keeps on giving, for I have a view of what I want for 2009 and am organizing it more every day!
I also got wonderful soap and chocolate bars, both of which are very high on my favorites list.
And I gave really good presents this year, for the recipient's reactions were honestly gleeful!